96: Pigeons

Hello, mum. You know like the wood pigeons we have all over the Mootland? Well, pigeons in the big cities like Altdorf and Middenheim, aren’t like that. They are smaller and greyer and they scavenge for whatever food they can find. And they’re quite used to human leftovers. They’d rather have the end of a sausage that fell into a puddle than a nice bunch of berries in a tree. They’re a bit like rats, to be honest.

Guido had gone to the desecrated temple we had found in Begleitersallee to reconsecrate it, or just to wash the paint off, or something. And it was really nice not having him around being all pompous. The rest of us went to see Schutzmann and he gave Vinny his own KITUM badge, which annoyed Blume a bit. And Vinny had used one of her curtain cords to tie up his huge trousers with, which annoyed her as well.

Schutzmann said that according to Fred’s report, Vinny and I had done well by distracting our various enemies while they had got Jarmund out of the chapel. And he asked Vinny if he wanted him to put the word out on the street that if any of the low kings, especially the Man, messed with Vinny they would have him to deal with. But Vinny said that wouldn’t be necessary, and I think that was probably wise of him. Anyway, Schutzmann told Vinny to be careful as the low kings had a long memory.

We talked about looking for Vizier Bahr, who had come up a few times, and who Fred thought could have signed the letter we had just decrypted. But we decided that Guido would be useful for that, and we knew a witch hunter from Copher, Abu Tawb, was after him. And Blume asked to speak to Jarmund again, but Schutzmann told her that he was being debriefed, but we would be allowed to talk to him after that.

Then we went to the armoury to pick up a new shield for Fred. And Vinny, on the authority of his new KITUM badge, picked out a new sword and shield, and some armour. Fred warned Vinny about showing his KITUM badge to everyone. He told him to use it carefully, especially around the minions of the low kings.

So we decided to go to the address in Sigismundweg in Osttor that was mentioned in the letter. We did a walk-by and could see that it was a sort of guest house in a lower-middle class area with a good view of much of the surrounding boroughs.

Vinny had a scout around and went round the back. He saw some stairs that he could climb up to, and managed to scramble up to the first floor. He found four doors which led to the four apartments of the guest house. He listened at each door and all the noises of modern life were going on behind them, except door number three was silent.

We decided that this was the right sort of area for Blume to blend in, and so we sent her into the front of the house, but unfortunately she decided to big up her role a bit. She complimented the humming landlady, who was called Frau Ziegler, on her fine voice, and introduced herself as a poet called Violette and offered to recite a haiku. It cannot be said that Blume doesn’t throw herself into her undercover personas even when its entirely unnecessary.

The land lady was a bit put off that the poem didn’t rhyme, and as you, and everyone else knows, mum, if it doesn’t rhyme then there’s no way it can be a poem. Blume said it was a common misconception that poems had to rhyme which just shows you how little she knows about that sort of thing.

Blume said the landlady could show her round but she replied that they didn’t have any vacancies. Blume tried to bribe her with a couple of shillings, but Frau Ziegler would not be moved. She explained that her apartments were usually let on reasonably long leases to seasonal workers. And then Blume came up with a story that she just wanted to hang out with musicians, so Ziegler pointed her to the Singing Moon, just up the road, which was owned by an elf.

Meanwhile, Vinny could hear a persistent tapping on a window, and he decided to climb up onto the roof to investigate. He attached his rope to the chimney and abseiled down to the front of the building, where he could see a pigeon pecking on the glass. There were several pigeon coops under the eaves, but they were all closed, and the pigeon seemed to be trying to get into apartment number three. Weirdly, it had a purple iridescent crest and three eyes.

Vinny managed to reach down and grab the bird and stick it in his sack. He looked through the window of number three as he continued to abseil to the ground, and saw an unmade bed, and some books on a table. Fred and I were keeping watch on the street, and he showed us the bird, which we agreed was quite strange. And then he showed us the message that had been attached to its leg, and it looked like it was written in the same code as Jarmund’s.

So Blume decrypted the message and it said, ‘Vogel. Have assumed command. Operations resume immediately, corpses needed for research. Acknowledge and await instructions. Y'ggrilv tkak Tzeentch! Vizier Bhar, MOT’.

We went around the back of the building to see if we could get into number three, but when Vinny tried to climb up to the stairs he was too loud (again) and Frau Ziegler came out. Fred had to flash his KITUM badge and tell her that it was a watch matter and he suspected number three was being used for seditious purposes. And when Frau Ziegler saw Blume, she said she knew all along she hadn’t been a real poet, because her poem hadn’t rhymed.

Ziegler said the room was let to a Herr Vogel, who seemed quiet and nice and who helped with her pigeons. She said he had been a tenant for a few months but she hadn’t seen him for a few days, but he was often studying at the Collegium Theologica. Fred said that the Collegium was the biggest library in Middenheim and used especially for training young Ulricans.

Ziegler let us into the room and we saw some books on mathematics, and there was a telescope by the window pointing towards the south of the city. Fred had the idea to release a pigeon to see if the telescope was trained on its destination, and we sent Vinny up to the roof to follow the pigeon’s path, in case it wasn’t.

So Vinny went to climb up to the top of the roof again. But he did it very badly and ended up falling off, and hurting himself. And I think when he landed he fell on the bird in his bag, and so that died. To be honest, mum, as a three eyed bird with unusual plumage, that was probably the best thing for it. So I had to climb on the roof instead, and actually it wasn’t that difficult. I suspect that if Vinny is really a top burglar in Middenheim, then the crime rates must be very low. Anyway, Vinny gave Ziegler a few shillings for her damaged roof.

So Fred released a pigeon and it went nowhere near where the telescope was aiming, and I saw it fly off north. And we realised that that was probably one of Frau Ziegler’s pigeons.

And so then Fred grabbed one with purple feathers. But before he released it he had the idea to write a fake message to the purple hand, and so Blume encrypted it and it said, 'Jarmund arested. Need immidiate meetin. Wen and where. Y'ggrilv tkak Tzeentxh! V', probably. And when they released it I saw it fly south towards Altquartier, and Fred followed it with the telescope and he saw that it went to a street between the Wynd and Altmarkt.

We decided that someone needed to stay at the guest house in case we got a reply to our message, and so Blume and Fred stayed and Vinny and I went down to the Wynd. And we arranged to meet at the Templar’s if anything happened.

And on the way we discussed how nice it was to live in a nice house, and we agreed that Blume’s lion claw bath was the best chamber pot we’d ever used. But once we got close to the Wynd Vinny was less happy about things, and he said we had to be careful as this was the border between the Man and Gouda territory. But as we were getting closer to the red light district Vinny said ‘let’s find some birds,’ which was funny, mum, because Vinny is the top shagger but we were looking for pigeons.

On the street we saw that lots of pigeons seemed to be congregating around a dilapidated two storey building, and so, with little else to go on, we went there. It was pretty filthy, mum, and full of bird droppings and feathers and things. But there was a man there, and he, not to be rude about him behind his back, was as crazy as Big Jim in mating season.

He wouldn’t really talk to us, but would answer our questions to his pigeons, and even though there were hundreds of pigeons in there, it seemed like he had named every one of them.

He didn’t have any pigeons with purple crests, but the other pigeons told him that purple birds went to a place with lots of crates and boxes in the Wynd, that stayed busy all night. To thank him Vinny offered him a couple of shillings for some linseed loaf but the man, he was called Heintz, said he didn’t need any money. And he called himself, and his pigeon friends, the Pigeon Guild. And, I suppose if dockers and apothecaries need their own guilds, it makes sense that pigeons have their own guild, too, mum.

Anyway, we said goodbye to Lady Greyplume, and Admiral Avi Anne, and Lord Pek the Iridescent, and Countess Clawfoot, and Baron Roller, and the rest of the guild, and went for a walk down the Wynd to see if we could see a place that matched the pigeons’ description. And we saw a busy warehouse with pigeons around it called Wyndhund Haulage.

All those pigeons had made me hungry for pie, so we went to the Templar’s for lunch. After lunch Vinny went off to talk to Maurice about Wyndhund Haulage. He said he was just his contact, but I think he wanted to get revenge on Maurice for betraying him to the Man despite taking a hefty bribe. But when Vinny got to Maurice’s pawnshop, he saw that all his fingers were bandaged and some of them were sticking out at odd angles. It turns out Max had tortured Maurice to find out what Vinny had said about Jarmund, and Max had stolen the bribe anyway.

So Vinny was pleased to say that he had killed Max, but Maurice said that he had heard that he had only wounded him. But it didn’t really matter as Max was dead and Vinny had helped. And so Maurice apologised for grassing on Vinny, and Vinny said he was sorry that Maurice had got tortured and so they made up.

Vinny asked if Maurice knew anything about Wyndhund Haulage and he said that he had heard that they hadn’t taken on any new customers for some time but they were still working as busily as ever. And that seemed a bit suspicious. Then he told Vinny to be careful because that area was tightly controlled by the Big Cheese.

Vinny asked if it had anything to do with bodysnatching but Maurice didn’t know and said you could get lots of bodies from the Drop, anyway. So Vinny put a couple of shillings on the desk to thank Maurice, but I don’t think he could pick them up. And when Maurice asked if there was anything he could do about his fingers, Vinny suggested he visit Hartpetal Hospital.

So that’s that, mum. I expect we will go to Wyndhund Haulage soon. Perhaps this afternoon, or perhaps we will wait until nightfall. I’ll let you know if that lead goes anywhere in my next letter. It might be dangerous, but at least Guido isn’t around at the moment telling me what to do all the time.