60: The Minotaur Fight

So, mum, remember I told you Guido had got a bit drunk and was having a go at Blume. Blume decided to go shopping to avoid him, but he just followed her and kept lecturing her about her behaviour, which was a bit pointless, because I think Blume was concentrating on shopping. She went round some of the stalls at the carnival and tried to get a discount out of the stallholders by promising to mention them in her pamphlet but she didn’t have much luck

Guido kept telling her to buy a crossbow as that was a better weapon than a pistol, and insisting that he could shoot her three times with a crossbow before she could even load a pistol, but he never demonstrated it. Anyway Blume loves her black powder as much as I do so there’s no way she is going to change to a crossbow.

They went to a haberdasher and saw a fancy bow (the sort you tie your hair with), and Blume asked Guido to buy it for her, and I suppose it must have been because he was drunk but he did, and he bought himself a tall black hat with a skull buckle, which he said would make any witch seeing him flee his presence. And Blume said she would write about him in her pamphlet and Guido put his arm around her and said that after a few drinks she was a better person.

Then Blume had the idea to buy Willow a smaller bow like hers and a leather jacket that looked a bit like her new coat so that they could be a team, or something. To be honest, I think both of them had had too much to drink.

Willow took Dreamy and me down to the Wynd to check out Schwarz again. We went past the cooper’s surreptitiously and then tried to find Karl, the urchin who had stolen the pasty. We didn’t find him but found someone who was in the same gang, called Uli ‘Muli’ Muller, who joked that they had given Karl a hard time because Willow had made him wash Piemacher’s windows. Willow gave the whole gang (of five) the job of buying a pie from Piemacher every day and reporting back on whether the pies were improving.

And she gave them the task of keeping an eye on Annette Schwarz and people who visited the coopers for four pence each per day. She told them to report to her every morning at ten, at the Templar’s. And she offered to see to any ailments they had and Uli told her that Karina had a bad ankle and he would send her on the first report so Willow could see to it the next morning. As we left the Wynd to head to the minotaur fight we had to walk past Piemacher’s shop and Willow looked in at him, perhaps a bit menacingly, and perhaps he looked a bit frightened.

Meanwhile Guido and Blume were heading towards the minotaur fight, too, and Guido was telling Blume all about how the Estalian system of government works. Blume only seemed interested in pointing out how much better the Imperial system was than the Estalian one, which Guido didn’t agree with. In the end he told Blume that they should go to Estalia together so she could see for herself.

And he told her that her political observations weren’t very good and if she published what she said then she would get assassinated on behalf of the nobility. And he offered to help edit her pamphlet just to double check what she was publishing. Blume said he could do that but he shouldn’t expect to be paid for it. As an example of Blume’s observations, mum, I heard her say that the Black Pool Illuminations were going to be rubbish this year because of the lizards.

On the way to the minotur fight we discussed the carnival and I think we all agreed that although the Middenheim carnival was a lot bigger and grander than the Schaffenfest, it was all a bit too organised and it didn’t have the same feeling of random fun as the Boegenhafen one.

And while we were chatting about that I felt someone yank my hat off, and saw it being quickly carried away through the crowd. I gave chase but soon bumped into someone and fell down, but Willow and Dreamy carried on after it.

They had to run nearly all the way to the Great Park after the hat, and every time they thought they were gaining on it, it seemed to get away again. But they did catch a glimpse of the thief who was wearing brightly coloured motley clothes.

Then Willow collided with a hot dog stand and got covered in hot dogs (which turned out not to be a bad thing – Willow) and eventually Dreamy caught up with the thief at the gates of the Great Park. The thief didn’t even look out of breath like he had intended to be caught, after all. And when he gave the hat back everyone around cheered him, and he told Dreamy it was just a bit of Yokel baiting.

We all found each other again and got some free hot dogs from Willow, but Dreamy was still really annoyed and he said that if he saw the hat thief again he would put an arrow in him. And we said that it was just one of those jokes and that we play jokes a bit like that back in the Moot during pie week, but we could see that Dreamy was not amused. Anyway, I got my hat back.

Then we met up with Guido and Blume in the Bernabau stadium. Blume gave Willow the bow and the jacket, and when she put them on we could see how similar they looked. I’m still not really sure why she did it (neither am I but it was a nice gift – Willow) I think she is hoping the look will catch on. So we had to admire Blume and Willow looking like twins, and then we had to admire Guido’s new hat, too. He said his skull buckle was a fearful grimace to frighten witches but I thought it looked a bit like a smiling face.

Then it was time for the mintoaur fight, or as Guido called it, the bull fight. He explained to us all about bull fighting in Estalia and told us that he had even done one once, but wasn’t very good at it, and his brother had broken his arm doing it.

But it turned out minotaur fighting wasn’t quite the same. And to my surprise the minotaur wasn’t a man with a funny hat on, but a real monster. It looked like half a man and half a goat but it was about twice the size of a man, which is very big, and it was wielding a huge club (I think I would like to study beasts like that – Willow).

And then there were cheers and a man entered the arena. He had a sword and shield but no armour. I’m not sure if it’s a rule that he’s not allowed any armour or he just thought he didn’t need it.

Guido told us about the three stages of a classic bullfight, where the first stage was to tire the bull out, and the second stage was when the Banderilleros attacked it with lots of spear strikes, and the third stage was when the matador ritually killed the bull.

The bloke behind us told us that this was a noble from Altdorf called Alchred von Hintz and he said he would give us three to one odds on him, so Blume put five shillings on von Hintz. Looking at the huge minotaur, I didn’t think she would see that money again.

Willow decided she would rather go down to the first aid tent and make herself useful rather than watch the fight from up here. So she went down and introduced herself, and once she had convinced the first aiders of her qualifications they said she could stay and be part of their team, although they said she wouldn’t get paid, but she could have a free beer. But they told her that the job was more like cleaning up than anything else, which sounded pretty ominous for Alchred von Hintz.

The man and the monster faced each other across the arena, and then the beast gave a loud bellow and charged straight at von Hintz. He hit him hard, really hard, but von Hintz stood up to it surprisingly well. He countered with his sword, but that was ineffective and then the creature clubbed at the man, hitting him squarely and knocking him to the ground where he lay unconscious. We had waited half the day for that and it was over in a few seconds.

The Banderilleros who were stationed all round the ring then edged into the arena and began prodding the minotaur back towards its cage. Then I noticed Dreamy nock an arrow, and I wondered what he was doing, but then I saw that Willow had wandered into the middle of the ring to get to von Hintz. Luckily the Banderilleros did their job and Willow was able to deal with von Hintz without getting eaten. She saw to his wounds and then gave him some Salwort to bring him to his senses, and he was able to limp out of the arena. And Willow even gave Dreamy a wave as they walked off.

We watched a few minor bouts at the arena, and Guido spotted Dieter a few rows in front of us, and so he called to him. He told him that he had won his fight, and so they might be meeting soon in the tournament. Dieter was friendly enough about it, but one of his colleagues made a joke about Estalian tomatoes, which was a bit low. And the four of them had a laugh at Guido’s expense.

So Guido shouted something back about the man’s mother looking like the minotaur. I was a bit worried about this as the four of them looked very important and they were wearing full armour. And everyone went a bit quiet for a moment.

But then Dieter let out a big laugh, and then two of his mates did too, and so the fourth guy was forced to have a laugh at his own expense to show what a good sport he was. And then Dieter invited Guido down to meet his friends, and being Guido, he just walked through the middle of the crowd climbing across everyone’s seats.

Dieter’s companions were an illustrious bunch. They were Watch Commander Ulrich Schutzmann, General Johann Schwermutt the garrison commander, and Marshal Maximillian von Genscher who commanded the entire army of Middenland. They were called the Midden Marshals, and I think Fanmaris had mentioned them to Guido when they were talking earlier today.

Guido was soon chatting to them about the minotaur fight and other military stuff. Then they got on to the strife between the Ulricans and the Sigmarites, and it turned out that Schutzmann was a Sigmarite so he had things to say about that to Guido. But they all seemed to be pretty level headed about the issue, unlike a lot of the common populace. Guido ended up getting on with them really well, or at least that’s what he said, and he had a few more beers with them.

Meanwhile Willow was talking to von Hintz. She asked why he had wanted to fight such a monster, and he said it was for the money and the fame. She said that as a noble he didn’t need that but he said he was from a lesser noble family and so the deed could have helped his family if he had won. And he said he did have a decent chance of winning the fight (but he didn’t – Willow). Then she told him to stay out of trouble and came to find us.

The first thing she said to Dreamy was that nobody had bothered to thank her, not the noble and not the other medics. And Dreamy didn’t thank her either, he told her off for risking her life in the arena (No one pays attention to me in fights, anyway – Willow).

The bloke behind us said that there would only be a few minor bouts for the rest of the day but some dwarf with orange hair would be fighting the minotaur tomorrow. We guessed it was the dwarf that we had seen earlier today, looking out of his head.

Willow went back to the first aid tent to get her form signed and she told them that she wanted the opportunity to give all the prospective fighters a comprehensive medical to make sure they were fighting fit. The other medics couldn’t really see the point of it. They did talk about the dwarf, though and Willow found out his name was Glugnar.

Then Blume remembered that she had to pick up her pamphlets so she went down to Otto’s. She was pleased with the print job and told Otto she would get the next issue’s copy to him first thing in the morning. And he told her he had a drop box round the side of his shop she could use if it was ready before the shop opened, but Blume didn’t think she would be awake before the shop was open.

Otto did say something about it being important to broaden the populace’s minds, and Blume agreed. Otto seemed quite enthusiastic about that and he asked her how she might want to broaden them and Blume said something about a return to the traditional class structure, which Otto wasn’t so enthusiastic about.

Then she went out into the street to find someone who could distribute her pamphlets for her. She saw the five urchins who Willow had hired to keep an eye on Schwarz, and they were just sat around outside the coopers making no effort to be surreptitious. And then she spotted a messenger boy who agreed to hand out all the pamphlets for twelve pence plus another two pence for verbal advertising (these messenger boys all sound the same – Willow). Then he wandered off with the pamphlets shouting something about the ramblings of a mad woman.

Then Blume came to meet us at the royal gardens and we watched a play called A Knight’s Midsummer Dream. I’m not sure I understood it, because some of the language was weird, but it seemed to me to be about elves (really humans with pretend ears) playing tricks on people in a forest for no reason. And the gardens were disappointing because it was all short grass and heavily topiaried bushes, and almost nothing that looked like it was growing happily.

One good thing about Middenheim, though, I really disliked being in Altdorf because you couldn’t see any proper greenery anywhere and after a few hours of that it would get you down. At least in Middenheim, because we’re so high up, almost anywhere in the city, you can look out and see some forest in the distance, so that’s something (someone said that if we wanted to see some proper plants we should go to the botanical gardens – Willow).

Meanwhile Guido was getting drunk with his new mates. They were still chatting about the troubles between the Ulricans and Sigmarites and they said that it was getting worse but they didn’t know what was causing it. But he was getting on very well with them. Guido did come to us saying he had been guided by Myrmidia to look after us. But now he wasn’t interested in herany more and had gone off with Sigmar. So if he prefers to go off with his new important human mates and leave us behind then I’m sure we will understand.

They did say though that now the Graf was unwell, after what happened to his wife, if there are any military issues they have to discuss them with the graf’s son, Baron Heinrich. Guido said that must be awkward but they said it wasn’t so bad as the son was a good man. And they invited Guido back to their box to watch Grugnar fight the minotaur tomorrow.

So after the play we headed back to the Templar’s Arms. It had been a long day, and the carnival and other things had kept us really busy. I was feeling very tired, mum, and hoping that I got some proper sleep tonight so I would have the energy to do all the stuff at the carnival again, tomorrow. And I’ll tell you how that goes in my next letter.